Catchy lyrics that seem to show up in my head for time to time. What does it mean to listen to your heart?
I watched yesterday Howl's moving castle, my favorite movie at this point. And for the first time I saw that the power of the heroine Sophie, come from connecting to her heart. And that gave her the magic to change her world and of those around her. And I noticed it, because it resonated with my life. I believe that my strongest quality that will keep me going in any circumstances, is my creativity combined with my adaptability. Not my hard work, ambition, dedication, strong will, but they help. And when I am at my best with creativity? When I am stuck, when my mind does not see a way out, when all solutions fail. And then from lack of choices, I connect to my heart, my intuition and emotions and then everything falls in place and voila I have the answer to my problem. This happens both in my private and my science career, where I learn to actively use it before I hit the wall.
So why can't I do it all the time? Because of my conviction that I am not good enough and that control of what I do not like about me, makes me a better person. And then I go to I should and I must and push and push until I hit the wall. I am so afraid to do things because I want to, as I am not good enough also my choices are not good enough. And then I get into sadness, control, anger, guilt and more sadness while I put joyful masks for the outside world. And finally I hit the wall, I listen to what I want and then I am happy and content. And I start again. Sophie from the above mentioned movie does the same thing, until she learns to listen to her life, and whishes. Guess I am around there too.