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mari19ian
Jul 27, 20211 min read
Truth vs rationalizing
Even both seem natural to our brain, there is a large difference between truth and rationalizing. Rationalizing comes natural to our...
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mari19ian
Jul 8, 20211 min read
Healthy versus unhealthy guilt and shame
The parenting in my family for generations was done with guilt and shame. And was so much intertwined with what was said to be love, or...
20
mari19ian
Jun 30, 20211 min read
Doing nothing
The message that come to me the past days was do nothing. Standstill and wait for things to unfold. Hm that is not that easy and for sure...
41
mari19ian
Jun 24, 20211 min read
Inner child - part 6 and letting go
I find challenging to let go of situations and people that run their course in my life and I can acknowledge that. Behind the maybe I...
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mari19ian
Jun 19, 20212 min read
Inner child -part 5
I mentioned in a previous post that one my childhood life scripts was that I felt responsible for my caregivers and extended from there...
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mari19ian
Jun 14, 20211 min read
Inner child part 4
This one has contains a repetition, and a clarification in my childhood beliefs. I mentioned in a previous part that I saw myself as...
20
mari19ian
Jun 2, 20211 min read
Inner child - part 3
And there might be more to come. Or not. Guess will see. And more realizations to come too. I am triggered by anger and what I perceive...
40
mari19ian
May 27, 20212 min read
Inner child - part 2
So been doing some exercises of connection to my inner child - the part that reacts emotionally very strong with emotions connected to...
110
mari19ian
May 18, 20212 min read
Inner child
I have been watching several of the youtube videos of Patrick Teahan. They spoke to me in a new way as many of them are roleplays showing...
40


mari19ian
May 11, 20212 min read
Pain and healing
After a serious depression at 13 years old that took quite some tall on me I have been afraid of my own pain for many years to come. I...
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mari19ian
May 5, 20211 min read
When to wish equates to choose
When one is in alignment the deepest wished will be fulfilled because will take the choices leading to those wishes. Life can be chaotic...
80

mari19ian
Apr 26, 20212 min read
Love addiction
I think from quite a few of my posts here one thing to be noticed is love addiction, or forever searching of some ideal love that will...
40

mari19ian
Apr 12, 20212 min read
Attachment styles
or when all comes as one piece....I studied this weekend more the 4 attachment styles. When checking them for the first time some time...
30
mari19ian
Apr 5, 20211 min read
Poetry, Stalker and the meaning of life
"So summer is gone, leaving no epitaph. It's still warm in the sun, only that's not enough. All that true could have come, like a...
50


mari19ian
Mar 26, 20212 min read
Waiting for someone else
Hm after some months I have a partial idea what was the attached painting about. I thought for long was about my father and our sometimes...
70


mari19ian
Mar 22, 20212 min read
Solitude as the source of all evils
Was wondering the last past weeks from where come part of the fear of solitude that I felteven when embracing it almost fully. And then I...
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mari19ian
Mar 15, 20211 min read
It's alright
Is fine to be complex and find new traits and complex emotions and feelings in new situations. I used to feel guilty and conflicted by...
60

mari19ian
Mar 11, 20212 min read
Validation
The need for external validation was for many years an underground string desire. Underground because I told to myself that I did not...
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mari19ian
Mar 3, 20212 min read
Family, back to the family
For the first time since I moved away from home I placed old, black and white photos of different members of my family on display. Before...
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